My mind is a total blank right now. In terms of yoga, that is a very good thing, provided the mind is blank and aware at the same time. Technically, it is not blank because there are a few things rattling around in there even now, but for all practical purposes it is, because there is nothing worthwhile going on. It is in "rambling" mode. Well, heck, that is how it is most of the time, but for some reason today feels different. It feels like having penetrated the field of unchecked boredom and emerging out at the other end. Now, even boredom is behind one. There is a certain wackiness in being like this. Something inside is always hankering for the normalcy that is the space of play between bouts of being bored. However, you cannot trade this position for the earlier one, quite simply because that was utter nonsense that had been granted normal status just because the majority indulged in it.
So here we are, enjoying half a chunk of do-nothing-ism Half a chunk because it has not yet fully sunk in. One could just be, but that requires additional maturity and that in turn requires waaaaaay too much work to happen so quickly.
Fortunately, it is happening at a good time because I am verging very close to a relapse. When you alter your perspective as rapidly as I did, there is a danger of not stopping at the opposite end and come full circle, back where you started. This inertia stuff is simply too powerful. Like trying to turn on your heel in zero gravity, one miscalculation and you might end up spinning like a top (not to mention utterly disoriented because in zero g you might be moving any which way mass moves).
According to most experienced meditators that I have spoken to, such a phase is inevitable in most cases. When you are a creature of the "cause and effect" species, the absence of effect will inevitably lead to questioning the cause, thus making one question whether what is being done is right or even necessary. The only apparent solution is to stick to it. In effect, this is the acid test of one's ability to abandon the effect and simply keep performing the cause. Even if nothing happens, you keep doing what needs to be done. The longer nothing happens, the better it will be when something finally does.
Patience, I need patience. And a little sense.
So here we are, enjoying half a chunk of do-nothing-ism Half a chunk because it has not yet fully sunk in. One could just be, but that requires additional maturity and that in turn requires waaaaaay too much work to happen so quickly.
Fortunately, it is happening at a good time because I am verging very close to a relapse. When you alter your perspective as rapidly as I did, there is a danger of not stopping at the opposite end and come full circle, back where you started. This inertia stuff is simply too powerful. Like trying to turn on your heel in zero gravity, one miscalculation and you might end up spinning like a top (not to mention utterly disoriented because in zero g you might be moving any which way mass moves).
According to most experienced meditators that I have spoken to, such a phase is inevitable in most cases. When you are a creature of the "cause and effect" species, the absence of effect will inevitably lead to questioning the cause, thus making one question whether what is being done is right or even necessary. The only apparent solution is to stick to it. In effect, this is the acid test of one's ability to abandon the effect and simply keep performing the cause. Even if nothing happens, you keep doing what needs to be done. The longer nothing happens, the better it will be when something finally does.
Patience, I need patience. And a little sense.
